Why is it hard to live fully in the present?
I don’t know about you, but I have a tendency to look back, look ahead and not always focus on “the now”. It is easier to dwell on past accomplishments; equally, it?s fun to dream about what we want to do and where we want to be in the future, instead of concentrating on what is in front of us at this very moment. It is hard to be fully present!
It is particularly difficult to concentrate on the present when we are dealing with a major life transition like a suddenly empty nest, a career change, retirement, starting a new business, relocating and/or downsizing, caring for an elderly loved one, or going through a relationship change, such as divorce.
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Being Present in Divorce
When going through a divorce, we have a tendency to dwell on the past; we miss what we know, the things that are familiar, and the lifestyle that we can probably no longer afford. Being in the “Now” can be painful. We try to ignore or avoid the pain, rather than focusing on it and working through the underlying issues.
Consider this quote by Marianne Williamson that I recently shared:
“You do not heal the past by dwelling there; you heal the past by living fully in the present.”
A major part of the divorce process is healing. If you are going through a divorce, then something wasn?t working!? You need to process that and work through it – I highly recommend seeing a therapist to help you do just that. At the same time, that you are seeing that therapist, what else can you do to help yourself? You need to engage in other forms of self-care. What can you do to relieve some of the stress and angst that you are feeling? Consider exercise, yoga, pilates, massage, acupuncture, and chiropractic care. Do any of these resonate with you?
Practice Self Care
I have a self care regimen. ?I have found that I feel most present when I am in tune with my body and I am feeling good. All the things I do (pilates, weight training, massage, chiropractic care) help to center, ground and focus my attention. From that place, I find that I have more clarity about what I want at this moment, and I stay in the present. It is a renewing cycle! I want to stay in this space of feeling good and make the most of it. I feel productive and happier, and I enjoy life in the moment!
These are the things I want for each of you. What are you doing now to help you live fully in the present? What do you need help with? Schedule a complimentary consultation and let’s talk.